12 May 2015

Deliciously Dirty 5

Now, Mr. Handsome and I are sitting in awkwardness and not quite sure what to do, this isn't going the greatest for me. I am now uncomfortable twice on our date. One more and I'm out of here and I'm pulling out the sick card. So... Did I pull the sick card out or did Mr. Handsome make it happen?

This is my 5th series of Deliciously Dirty, my little love story . If  you are following our love story just click on the previous posts to the left!

We went and saw a movie. Mr. Handsome was so excited and thrilled that it was showing. It was the strangest oddest movie I had ever since in my 19 years. Oh no! My hand is twitching to reach into my pocket to pull out the sick card. The movie was called "Fletch Lives" and Mr. Handsome loved it! He laughed at everything most heartedly. He had obviously seen it many times and I never.  It was also my first experience with someone quoting a movie out loud and laughing prior to the joke. I keep looking around me at all the other people sitting in this theater watching their reactions. They too are laughing hysterically. Am I the only prude, am I the only one who doesn't appreciate Chevy Chase humor? Mr. Handsome was clueless to the fact that the movie was boring me to me. I was laughing at him and his outbursts. He was like a child in a candy store lapping up every scene with such an insatiable appetite. I found him humorous and delightful to watch. I enjoyed listening to his audible unhindered chackle. A chuckle and a hackle mix. He thought I was laughing at the movie. 

Throughout the movie he would reach for my hand which was always readily available to be held. He would bring my hand over to his lap and the two of our hands would rest on top of his knee as if there was an invisible mold that cradled our hands. Occassionally, he would caress my back and play with my hair some. I'm not much for hair playing it slighly annoyed me and I playfully leaned forward and took a drink, hoping that I wouldn't offend.
The movie ended and I breathed a huge sigh of relief! YES! now we both can truly fun. Mr. Handsome grabbed my hand and helped me with my jacket and escorted me out to his car. He asked me if I liked the movie. I said, not as much as I enjoyed watching you like the movie. He was taken back at my response. He had the look of disappointment riddled across his face. It was hard for him to hide such raw emotion and it caught me by surprise. He was jilted. He wanted me to enjoy it as much as he had. I had not realized how much my happiness meant to him and how much he wanted to please me.  (But to this day, I still struggle to like Chevy Chase and his humor). This moment and that feeling had made a lasting impression on me. I wanted him to always feel success with anything that he did for me or planned for me, that I would express my gratitude first.

Mr. Handsome always opened my door for me. I was accostomed to this because Mr. Blue Eyes would always open every door for me as well. EXCEPT, Mr. Blue Eyes would adorn me with compliments.  Mr. Blue Eyes would say, "After you Beautiful" or "For you my love", it would always send a rush of blood straight to my cheeks. I loved it, I thought it was special only to me, until I heard it escape his lips to others and I realized it wasn't just for me, it was a part of who he was.

I liked Mr. Handsome's mannerisms. I liked his ability to laugh at himself and to laugh! I liked his carefree sense and I liked that he wasn't worried if others thought he was laughing too loudly. I always worried too much of what others thought. His strong sense of self and confidence calmed the twitching hand that had been twitching earlier for the sick card.  Mr. Handsome has a silent sense of strength that shouts I am capable of anything you wish of me. I was wondering what Mr. Handsome was doing back in my neck of the woods so very far from his own.

I didn't feel that Mr. Handsome was thinking long term or anything with me. I felt that he had nothing better going on in Provo and would come visit his friend again. Seeing me was just an added benefit. Our night over all was ok and fun but I didn't get any lip smacken! The movie was over and I had 15 minutes to get back to the dorms before curfew! Yep, living in the dorms on school campus has a curfew. Gosh, if I come in late my dorm mom is waiting in the main entrance gathering room with a sign in sheet! Dang, she had the ability to make you feel like a heathen and let me tell you 15 minutes isn't worth feeling that. So, I had two choices. Meet the wrath of Dorm mom or miss curfew and wait until she goes to bed.
What would my decision be?


Defenders of the Family Proclamation



This month's visiting teaching message is we can choose from any of the conference talks from April! I'm choosing one from each Conference session! Defenders of the Family Proclamation!
Sister Bonnie L. Oscarson speaks on three points of boldly defending the Lord's doctrine pertaining to Marriage, families, divine roles of men and women and the importance of our home and sacred places.

This is from the Women's conference! 

Oprah Winfrey had Maria Shriver on her show and Maria shared a story of what it was like to be in her home! it hit me as poignant and something that I was going to implement in my own home. She had mentioned or wrote in her book about being the only girl with four brothers and coming from a highly competitive family in everything but her father was adamant about when they walked through those doors they would only be kind to each other. That the world tears you down but in their home, in those doors was their safe place, a haven. I knew I wanted that too. I knew how cruel and hard the world is on you, and the negative feed back our children are fed daily from music, friends, teachers etc, even church. But, in the walls of our home they would not have that! I have tried and I have failed somewhat as well, but it has been an active goal to accomplish! 

I honor and love being a mother! It is my most aspired career! anything else I labor for and get paid for is a just a job but motherhood is my career! I educate myself in how to decorate our home, make whiter clothes, cook, clean every aspect of my career my goal is to excel. I want to be respectful of my husband's job and the money he earns! I don't want to spend it frivolously. I want him to be with us and for our children to find happiness in moments and not in things! I am glad that Mr. Incredible has set our divine rolls as nurturer, mother and father as his top priority as well! 

The choices I have made for and behalf of my family are mine and not all have worked but all were made with the intentions of doing what I felt was best. There is not one plan of what works for one will work for another. We are so different and such individuals who have different strengths and weaknesses! We need to be prayerful and turn to the Lord for inspiration and guidance so we can align our will with His. 

27 April 2015

Visiting Teaching Message April - Attributes of Jesus Christ without guile or hypocrisy


This month's message is being more like Christ by learning to be without guile or hypocrisy! Such an excellent message that can be found here!



What is it like to be without guile and hypocrisy. As I put this trait to task I realized that there were areas in my life where I needed to work on this more! I found that I am pretty persuasive and able to get people what I want or need them to do by just mere suggestion. Is this guile? I knew I wanted them to do something, so instead of by flattery first or mere suggestion shouldn't I have just requested and asked for them to do what I wanted them to do in the first place. I also learned that I can omit things from conversation. But, did this lack of detail serve me better or the other person. I consider myself a pretty good person of high integrity and words or motives may escape me at first but my CONSCIENCE always always gets the better of me and I have to be honest and forthright and tell you, the real deal and deception on my part. I felt like there was deception but when coming clean people look at me like I'm weird! Sad, because they don't even know when they were being manipulated because it has become the norm in our society! I think because I have been manipulated and lied to and people who don't honor their words both stranger and friend. I have become quite a skeptical and reserved person when it comes to depending on others. Church member and friend, stranger and acquaintance. I never take things for face value and always am trying to decipher if there is an hidden agenda in someone's requests! So sad, but I've been betrayed that way and true betrayal only comes from those whom you have trusted.
I believe it is why I am brutally open and honest and cut to the point and let you know what I need from you and the reason why I come back and disclose all. I'm not a saint at completely being honest I struggle when I think I may get in trouble but honesty has always proven me well, and it is the greatest compliment when employees and friends and others look to my answer for confirmation.

Understanding that Jesus Christ is without guile and hypocrisy will help us faithfully strive to follow His example. Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin (1917–2008) of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles said: “To beguile is to deceive or lead astray. … A person without guile is a person of innocence, honest intent, and pure motives, whose life reflects the simple practice of conforming his [or her] daily actions to principles of integrity. … I believe the necessity for the members of the Church to be without guile may be more urgent now than at other times because many in the world apparently do not understand the importance of this virtue.”1
Of hypocrisy, President Dieter F. Uchtdorf, Second Counselor in the First Presidency, said: “None of us is quite as Christlike as we know we should be. But we earnestly desire to overcome our faults and the tendency to sin. With our heart and soul we yearn to become better with the help of the Atonement of Jesus Christ.”2
We know “we will be judged according to our actions, the desires of our hearts, and the kind of people we have become.”3 Yet as we strive to repent, we will become more pure—and “blessed are the pure in heart: for they shall see God” (Matthew 5:8).
I'm grateful for these little golden nuggets that we get to work on each month!


This great handout can be found here! I just love her blog and that she shares!
I love the talk about looking through our own windows and not judging! I am the least judgmental judgmental person I know! Did you catch that?? Read it again!
I really do give people the benefit of the doubt and if someone tells me I'm not going to like someone I instantly like them! and when being briefed on a new calling and we have to go over names I listen until it goes negative and I will say, Please don't tell me anything more. I would like to base my judgments on how they treat me or how they react! I don't wan't to be swayed by other's opinions!

Being with the youth I hear a lot of comments and words that they say and use. I am surprised that things that I think are very judgmental are not in their eyes. What is being judgmental? I think being judgmental is anytime you JUDGE or put another person down and whether by your words, dress, actions, or deeds you attempt to rise yourself! Some things that I hear make my heart pound right out of my chest and I can't respond how I want to, but bite tongue and truly choose my words carefully. I ALWAYS ALWAYS re-echo what I just heard, say I understand how they could see it that way and then give the TEACHING MOMENT. Have you thought about this? Can we hold them to the same standards if they haven't been taught it. Youth pass judgement on each other, but then so do adults. Hears the judgmental part on MY PART- I hear these things and I shy away from the families. Because if their children feel this way they hear it from somewhere.

I think there is some hypocrisy in our church. We as parents teach our children to be friends with everyone. But, do we really mean it? Don't we mean be nice to everyone and be friendly but you aren't to be their friend. We worry and are concern if our children begin spending time with a smoker, a drinker, a pot user, etc. What would it look like, you will give the appearance that you do these things too! I HAVE TWO children who taught me this lesson painfully because I was the parent I just described and called on my hypocrisy! Mom, we are taught that we are to be friends and help and do this but you don't really want to do it. So True! Why, because I feared! I worried that perhaps they would be influenced and turn against all the years of our teaching and their upbringing and they would be influenced by one person who they met for weeks! C'mon, it's happened! What it boiled down to was they had a GREATER understanding of not being judgmental than we had even taught. We went over my concerns and what I truly worried for. I worried about their salvation. I worried that they would falter and make a wrong choice. But, being friends and teaching a better way and testifying of things they believe not only strengthens the individual but it strengthens THEM! and we discussed that it would be best to hang out and get to know people in our home and that their new friends were always welcomed in our home, as long as they respected our rules. I wanted to get to know them better so I could be comfortable.

What a wonderful blessing it is to have children so I can learn a better way and learn a deeper sense of trust, not only trusting my children but more importantly understanding that the atonement is more than a cleansing agent for sin, it is for everything!

Attributes of Jesus-Long Suffering and Patience

For the Month of March the visiting teaching message is learning Long Suffering and Patience! You can read more about here!




I really loved the words by President Uchtdorf this month!!
Patience is often thought of as a quiet, passive trait, but as President Dieter F. Uchtdorf, Second Counselor in the First Presidency, said, “Patience is not passive resignation, nor is it failing to act because of our fears. Patience means active waiting and enduring. It means staying with something … even when the desires of our hearts are delayed. Patience is not simply enduring; it is enduring well!

These words in bold are so true we don't just sit back and say what comes will come! and not just enduring it but enduring it well! I know that we have had to be patient in waiting on the Lord and that I had to have enough faith that the Lord knew I had to trial to become a better stronger me! I'm so grateful that each trial which at times have seen overwhelming that I plowed through it, endured and was able to see the sun and the bigger blessing!

President Uchtdorf continued, “Patience means accepting that which cannot be changed and facing it with courage, grace, and faith. It means being ‘willing to submit to all things which the Lord seeth fit to inflict upon [us], even as a child doth submit to his father’ [Mosiah 3:19]. Ultimately, patience means being ‘firm and steadfast, and immovable in keeping the commandments of the Lord’ [1 Nephi 2:10] every hour of every day, even when it is hard to do so.”1

Patience to stand firm and steadfast and immovable in keeping the commandments of the Lord. I have often felt like a duck on water. I may look calm and peaceful but underneath you are paddling like heck to stay afloat! I tried to always be strong for my children and others when inside I was anxiously waiting for the Lord to attend to me. Paddling like heck to do the daily tasks and fulfill callings, being ACTIVELY patient on the Lord. Continuing to do the things I knew to be right, to serve willfully and to give openly, even when it is hard to do. To be submissive to the Lord and knowing that in His time he would take care! I have heard many ask me how did you get through that, how did you do it? I still have no answer and sometimes I think did I get through it? But, the answer is You have no other choice! You just do it. You see what has to be done and you do it! You don't have time to sit and wait for someone else to take care of it and the number one thing that has gotten me and us through everything is FAMILY and sticking together. We are united in purpose and like a flock of geese is one injured we rally around them honk to encourage them and we are the wind beneath their wings. If you have never learned of the formation of geese as they fly you should read it, it's quite incredible!




Visiting Teaching Feb 2015 - Attributes of the Savior without Sin


This months visiting teaching message is Attributes of the Savior without sin! This is a cute handout that was found here! As always our monthly message can be found here

Can we become more like Him? Can we work on being without sin?


Our Savior, Jesus Christ, was the only one capable of making an atonement for mankind. “Jesus Christ, the Lamb without blemish, willingly laid Himself on the altar of sacrifice and paid the price for our sins,” said President Dieter F. Uchtdorf, Second Counselor in the First Presidency.1 Understanding that Jesus Christ was without sin can help us increase our faith in Him and strive to keep His commandments, repent, and become pure.
“Jesus was … a being of flesh and spirit, but He yielded not to temptation (see Mosiah 15:5),” said Elder D. Todd Christofferson of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles. “We can turn to Him … because He understands. He understands the struggle, and He also understands how to win the struggle. …
“… The power of His Atonement can erase the effects of sin in us. When we repent, His atoning grace justifies and cleanses us (see 3 Nephi 27:16–20). It is as if we had not succumbed, as if we had not yielded to temptation.
“As we endeavor day by day and week by week to follow the path of Christ, our spirit asserts its preeminence, the battle within subsides, and temptations cease to trouble.” 2
I know that He knows me! I know that although he was perfect and without sin that He understands every thought feeling and emotion that I feel. He understands my hurt, pain, insecurities, and He knows my love, desires and aspirations. I know that He knows me perfectly because of His greatest gift to me! He atoned for my sins and he atoned for my life! He loved me that much, how could I not love myself that much in return? I wish that the youth of today could truly understand this concept. I wish that adults of today would understand this! If we each truly understood this there would be less sin and more love and tenderness extended to everyone. I am not perfect and I fail each time I try, but I also get a little better each time I try and I never stop trying! Life is meant to be enjoyed and when we falter we are quick to make it right! I am so grateful for my Savior. I so love Him! May I strive a little harder to become more like him as I work on this attribute of being without sin! (may I always know and remember to pray daily and nightly and ask for forgiveness and strength to do better). 

Visitnig Teaching JAN 2015

I'm going to back track a bit because I want these on my social media sites and I want these on my blog! Now, that I can finally blog after 5 years of sparse entries! So, some pictures will be a back track of things and memories that I remember from the pictures! I want to capture moments, feelings and memories again! The hand out came from Marci Coombs


WE are focusing on the attributes of Christ and this month it is Obedience! I love that these messages are to strengthen and make us better and more Christlike! The message can be found here.

The scriptures teach “when we obtain any blessing from God, it is by obedience to that law upon which it is predicated” (D&C 130:21). Our spiritual growth takes place as we draw close to God through obedience and invite the power of the Savior’s Atonement into our lives.
“As we walk in obedience to the principles and commandments of the gospel of Jesus Christ,” said Elder D. Todd Christofferson of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, “we enjoy a continual flow of blessings promised by God in His covenant with us. Those blessings provide the resources we need to act rather than simply be acted upon as we go through life. … Obedience gives us greater control over our lives, greater capacity to come and go, to work and create.”2
I've had to work on being willingly obedient! I may obey but at times I do it begrudgingly or because I am suppose to or because it is expected to me! It has been great to do it because I truly want to! To do it because I decided to and it has been nice to feel that as I let go of the natural desires to be selfish to see the attribute of true obedience bless my life! Willfully obedient! Life is good and the gospel of Jesus Christ is so empowering and liberating! Would you like to know more? Please check us out at lds.org!

Decisions Determine Our Destiny!


When I lived in MO our Relief Society made 12x12 Tiles with vinyl lettering that read "Decisions Determine our Destiny", it is a quote from our prophet Thomas S. Monson which was first given in 1979!  and then more recently he gave an address found here.

Today I opened up my instagram and my heart got an INSTANT HUG or should I say an INSTA hug? I've seen this quote many times and we have it in our home but it meant more because it was posted by WARRIOR! I love him so and even though he is married and just recently celebrated his 24th birthday I still worry for him. Perhaps, it is because he is my first born but he makes my heart smile. Maybe because he was the brave one who chose to forge the way and take a chance on me that I would be the best mother to him which then convinced his three siblings to take a chance on me to be their mother and for that I am eternally grateful!


But this 24 year old man, who will always be my little boy, still loves his birthdays and celebrates them an moments with families with the same vigor that he had when he was 20 years younger! I love that!

 
But, he posted this picture and these words and if you know me on instagram than you know I HASHTAG the heck out of everything! I think it is comical to use hashtags and my children not so much! They are embarrassed by my hashtags so for the last year or so, I have tried to taper the hashtags.
 

I couldn't be more proud and I love he rocked his HASHTAGS! Sometimes, God answers the prayers of your heart in the sweetest ways! This was one of them! " Go forth and Go forward and may the decisions that you choose bring the Destiny you see!


TRICKERY

I continue to trick myself and tell myself for the past few years that two of my four children are grown and I no longer need to worry. But, the insane thing is when I married almost 26 years ago this July, amidst all the unwanted, unwarranted incessant words of advice when we first married or had our first child NO ONE truly gave me words of advice that would resonate or impact me as important as these words of advice I would soon realize almost two years after we married. So here it is! Two of the most important things I think a couple should know (kid wise)

1. The concept of marriage and children and having a happily ever after takes constant WORK, and I mean all capitalized! Having a beautiful garden and having it smile back at you takes constant tending and nurturing and fertilizing. You must pull the weeds out as they sprout and not wait until your garden is over taken and it makes for well set roots of deeper weeds and are sometimes so hard to pull out. Very much like a marriage and a relationship with your child! BUT, I feel duped or somewhat lied to or perhaps at 22 when we had our first born brought to us 10 weeks premature. I may have been viewing life through rose colored glasses!

2. You don't always stay in that happily ever after mode. Real life sets in and real bills come in and real expectations take over.

3. NO ONE told me the true importance of having a baby. I was always approached with WHEN do you two plan on having a baby, and Oh children are so fun, they are such a blessing and TRULY they are! But, how about getting down to the nitty gritty! When you choose to have a baby you are choosing to put aside your life and completely nurture and grow another life NOT for 10 years not for 20 years but for the rest of your life! You will continue to worry and love as soon as that heart begins beating inside your body!

4. I was under the fallacy of when my children turned 18, I could have my life back! Well, my oldest and my youngest are 10 years apart! But, then somewhere in the middle priorities change for the best as I learned to let go of the good and the better to reach for the best and my life's ambitions are more family geared than they were when I first set out on the journey of being a wife and a mother.

5. I remember when our oldest took out his own endowments when he was 19 and we went through the temple together! I had inhaled a glorious eternal breath and exhaled and thought to myself as I hugged him in the Celestial Room of the St. Louis, MO Temple. My work is done. I have accomplished all I can do as a parent. FOOLED AGAIN!

6. Almost 3 years later our oldest married in the Washington D.C. Temple in Kennsington, MD and this is where I raised my arms in celebration! YES, I am done! One child given back to the Lord! All saving ordinances have taken place.

But, does a true gardener ever leave their garden? Aren't they always pruning and fertilizing and weeding? And so it is true with parenthood. and that is the MOST IMPORTANT words of advice! When you make the choice to be a parent you are choosing to care and worry about all areas that your DNA footprint will have until your last breath. So, there is never a I'm done. But, more of a let me sit back and watch! Let's see how well I tended this plant. Will it grow and bloom and MOST importantly will it whether the storms, or the weeds when hard times comes or when someone else forgets to tend to the soil? Is there enough fortitude in this once little plant to withstand the elements?

I have a wonderful glimpse of what our loving Heavenly Father must feel. Did He nurture us enough while we were in his presence to withstand the elements of our earth life and as we progress and treat one another and curb our desires, wants and needs to be more Christlike and tend to the needs of others, does he smile as we continue to progress and think I'm almost done. I'm one step closer to not worrying? No, He will never stop worrying and never stop watching and smiling with our triumphs and hurting with our failures. He will never stop until we are safely home with him again!


10 February 2015

Be the Chocolate Chip

Tonight for YW we will be having a planning meeting but wanted to also give a short fun lesson! This is a quote from the book. I found the cute idea BE the Chocolate Chip

"The Chocolate Chip became famous for its ability to stand firm against the heat of the oven. Be the Chocolate Chip helps to bring to life the qualities that help us as followers of Christ and members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints stand strong and firm in a world of ever-increasing heat. Jen and Amy outline four steps that we can follow each and every day to stay firm and strong, and to be the chocolate chips in the cookies of life."How can you stand firm and strong?


We will then make some Eggless cookie dough
and I will have home made chocolate chip cookies! There is also a book called The parable of the chocolate chip cookie! I couldn't find this book. But, I do want to get it!
I advertised with this cute guy! 





08 January 2015

DANDELIONS.... finding the pretty amongst the weeds




Gone are the dandelions and gone are the days where my children were little. How many countless dandelions made it through my front doors of each home we have lived in.
How many endless smiles were given as my children so proudly handed me a beautiful a yellow weed, sometimes pristine and perfect and other times limp and lifeless. I always received them with great joy and happiness and would keep them in a small glass with water until they would wither away and die and I would toss them to the can, always a bit sad.

I love the dandelions. They are a symbol of innocence and pure love. I guess if asked what my favorite flower I would have to say a dandelion. WHAT?? It's not a flower, it is to me. Of course, I have a few other favorites but none hold a light to that of a beautiful dandelion. It represents my children and their ability to see beauty in the smallest things and to know to act immediately! They don't worry if it isn't good enough, or pricey enough. All they know is they see it and think of me and know that I would love it!

A dandelion symbolizes pure love. My beautiful children with light in their eyes would be out playing and stop dead in their tracks and pick something that they deemed beautiful and who did they want to give it to? Not to their friends, not to their dads, or any one other than to me, their mother. They thought of me and they picked it and with all adoring love gifted it to me! I love that pure innocence. I love that pure intent, not being worried of cost, or of looks or if it was the right size.

Early into our marriage when Warrior was three or four years old. He would bring me bouquets of flowers. Mr. Incredible was so busy working 60 hours and sometimes more, along with holding down 18 credits and making the Dean's list. How he did it, I have no idea. I believe he was on auto pilot and to make things even more challenging I was pregnant and on bed rest! I also felt neglected at times. I wasn't a needy wife, perse' but I did need some reassurance from time to time. I whined that I was being forgotten and he wasn't spending time with me or Warrior. (GEE, I wonder when I would like him to, time was definitely a rare commodity between that and his church calling. But, it was through a small boy, our boy that taught us many lessons! That life can be simple and it's not in the cost of the gift but to know that you are thought of.

I let Mr. Incredible know that I wanted him to bring me home weeds too! That Warrior could see something and in his eyes he saw beauty but more importantly that he thought of ME!.

One day Mr. Incredible brought me home a dandelion also. I laughed and then I cried because he heard me and thought of me and during such chaos and trial he remembered to stop and smell the dandelions and give thanks for all that was good in our lives! We since learned that if I was ever feeling like I needed extra love I would set an empty vase outside the door. Not to be filled immediately but that week, with either flowers or a little extra TLC! Placing the vase by the front door helped to ward off storms in our marriage and strengthen each other. Lessons from a dandelion and a little boy. God truly teaches us through our little ones. If we observe them we can learn so much.









A rose - The lesson of a rose



Shelle's post prompted my response. She doesn't mind sharing the goods on her other blog! She  is always a great read. She is young beautiful and I love that she She said she felt like she became more beautiful because of her children like she didn't know who she was early on in marriage. Really just click over and read what I'm talking about.

My response was I think of it like you were a beautiful rose bud. And with life experiences you blossomed and became a beautiful rose but we all know what happens after a rose blooms....it withers and dies. I threw that into just keeping her humble. But my response really prompted a true feeling.
Seriously, I hope that I pace myself and bloom and spread my petals daily because I look forward to each knew ray of sunshine that each day brings. I want to see grandchildren. etc,
but I hope that when my petals shall all fall that they would fall in the right time, when all of color has left the petal and when the last petal has shrivelled I would have known and my family and friends would have known it was a good life and the fragrance of the wilted petal would linger on in a sachet of sort like a beautiful memory.
I am 40, I don't see myself living to 100 so I have about spent half my life. I am being a better care taker and gardner of my rose. I am careful to be nourished only in the things that truly matter and are lasting to my family. I keep myself protected from the harsh winds by going to church, attending the temple and finding joy in serving. I have learned to take and prune a few of my thorns off through experience and repentance and tolerance. By learning to accept the things I can not change and still willing to change the things I can.
Thanks Shelle for prompting such an emotion from me.



LOL- Is Anyone Laughing?


Is Anyone Laughing?



In my miamaid class which consists of girls who are 14 and 15 yr old girls we have an activity each week. Where we do something fun but also has a learning principle either practical or doctrinal. We all have various senses of humor and mine can lean on the snarky side. Working with beautiful wonderful girls they also can be highly hormonal due to all the changes in their bodies as well as things that come about in their homes and at school. We thought an activity like this would help us get to know one another's laughing points and understand each other better.

The Sunday prior to our week day activity I asked them to research and find you tube videos that were funny and humorous. (no swearing or any other in appropriate things) and to also come with some stories that they would share of something funny that happened to them personally.

The night was a GREAT SUCCESS the howls of laughter permeated the room and we even had a few belly laughs that lead to tears! These girls are hilarious!! We entered our room and sat around a table and we first talked about what is funny.  We then watched some of the video links that each of the girls had brought in and that set the setting! We talked about and shared each others funny stories that happened to each of us and the girls all shared in laughing with and not laughing AT! We also learned to be observant of each other.

I bought jolly ranchers (jolly) and Laffy Taffy. Did you know that Laffy Taffy has jokes on the wrappers? They do and they were funny! WE also had a few popsicles that had jokes on the sticks and read a few of those.

I read a few remarks and quotes from Russell Wilcox "Is Anyone Laughing?"   Cutting remarks are really hurting.

Putting someone down is no way to build a friendship. People may chuckle at a put down to save face but deep down negative humor hurts.
"Keeping a sense of humor helps us endure the trials of life. It is truly medicine to the soul. " True friends help you feel better about yourself.


A good way to know if your comments are building or hurting is how many times do you have to follow your comments with "just kidding" or Love you, mean it Just kidding is a cop out. God did not send us here to degrate each other but to bless each other. (D&C 108:7

Elder Marvin J. Ashton in the New Era March 2009 Sometimes the humor in my family crosses over and the teasing turns to hurt. There are questions and answers about humor and how to deal with things if friends or family hurt your feelings. They need to know their behavior is not ok and gives ideas how to help this.
Have a better relationship so that you are able to distinguish between being hurtful and playful.
Love and Serve
Don't say Hurtful things, talk to the person and be an example.
"One of the adversary's tactics in the latter days is to stirring up hatred among the children of men. He loves to see us criticize each other, make fun of and generally pick on each other. The way we treat the members of our family is as important as are some of the more noticeable gospel principles.

We also played fun games! One of my favorite games is where everyone gets a balloon blows it up ties it to your leg with a string or ribbon and you have to protect your balloon while still trying to pop another person's balloon.  We also had a balloon relay where you blow your balloon up, tie it off and be the first to pop it.  I also brought saltine crackers and we shoved them into our mouths and had to be the first to whistle. Silly funny games that got the girls to relax, let their guards down, and let each other in.

03 December 2014

Seeker of Light

As my family grows and my interests have changed I have struggled to where I want to see my blogging go. I'm happy to be back typing my thoughts.

 I recently was on a photo shoot with a beautiful young woman. Our session began at 4pm and for about 20 minutes we dealt with light that cast a bit of a cold blue haze. But, as we continued shooting and moving around the pond the magical twilight hour came upon us and kissed her hair, cheeks and eyes!

 It was beautiful and incredible and every photo taken was breathtaking and gorgeous!!! I was so excited and thrilled and I just knew she was going to love every single shot. We were able to relax and pose and change outfits and take our time and everything had that golden glow around.

I noticed the trees around us were casting deep shadows and we had to seek higher ground. We began gathering our things and moving around and searching for the perfect spot, once again. When you are a natural light photographer, you are always seeking the light. We found another spot in the park with great lighting and I was able to fire off three or more pics before we had to gather and move our things, once more.

We were always seeking the light. We would search for it, find it and get there and have to move again. Previously, those very same areas were perfectly lit. The sun shone all around us but as the sun continued to journey across the sky and begin to set, our feet continued to hurry faster seeking it.
We finally went to higher ground and we were able to shoot for another 15 minutes of having a beautiful glow behind her and then the final minutes came where it became too dark to shoot.


 As I relate it to a gospel principles I realized that we truly are seekers of light. I seek for the light that brings out the best in their hair, eyes and skin and as a photographer, I will move around until I find it. In my personal life I seek for light that brings out the best in me and my family. I revel and bask when we find that perfect spot of warmth and comfort and familiarity. When the light shines on your face and it's the perfect temperature and you close your eyes and breathe it all in, only to give a beautiful exhale and release all stress, anxiety, fear and negativity.
As we were scrambling and running to the next area with perfect lighting, I realized we couldn't be there for long. We had to continually move because our light source was moving. I learned that sometimes what can start off good and appropriate can change and we need to recognize and be aware of where our light source is and if it is moving we must be willing to move with it.

It was a physical manifestation that when I got to higher ground I was able to bask in the once fleeting light a little longer. It matters where we stand. If we are going to be seekers of light we must stand in holy places.  May we always seek out the best of all things. Strive to be a little better and make a change in the world. One person can make a difference.  In Doctrine and Covenants 109:  And as all have not faith, seek ye diligently and teach one another words of wisdom; yea, seek ye out of the best books words of wisdom, seek learning even by study and also by faith;    

  to see more images from this session please go to http://chrys-tell-clearphotography.blogspot.com/2014/12/miss-r-charlotte-nc-senior-photographer.html